Still "Mama"

Yesterday, I was down and out and MIA for a lot of the time because of a gastrointestinal bug.  Thankfully, it seems like it was just a 24 hour type thing, but I was tired and sore and stayed in bed all day.  My husband took care of our little girl during the day, and then my mom came and took care of her that evening while my husband went to Bible study.  I felt bad having everyone take care of her when that's usually my job and you can tell she felt the same way.  She tried all she knew how to get back to our room and even succeeded in climbing in the bed a couple of times to be with her mama before getting dragged out kicking and screaming.  I missed my munchkin, but definitely did not want her to catch my illness.  It was so hard not to shower her with kisses like I always do.

Today, it was just me and her as usual, but I still took it easy.  We spent a lot of time cuddling on the sofa together and laying in the bed together.  Very laid back, easy-going day.

During lunch, I gave her a little bowl of my chicken noodle soup, knowing she would want whatever I was eating. ;)  She hungrily (and a little sloppily) ate her soup and then looked at me and said, "Mama is still Mama" with a smile.  Tearfully, I replied, "Yes, sweetie pie, Mama is still and will always be your mama."

It's times like these where I truly feel loved.

On the eve of my daughter's 2nd birthday

On the eve of my daughter's 2nd birthday, I am reminded of a song that I cried to every time I listened to it while pregnant with her.  It's such a beautiful song.  Here is a snippet of the song "Lullaby" by The Dixie Chicks:

They didn't have you where I come from

Never knew the best was yet to come

Life began when I saw your face

And I hear your laugh like a serenade

How long do you want to be loved

Is forever enough, is forever enough

How long do you want to be loved

Is forever enough, 'cause I'm never never

Givin' you up

Many a times, I sat and listened to this song and also sang it to my unborn daughter while she was still in the womb.  To my amazement, she even recognized it and calmed down when I sang it to her when she was born!  I need to try it now to see if it still works.;)  Anyways, this song was on my heart.  I highly recommend downloading it.  Enjoy.:)

My "baby" toddler

Is it normal to feel sad, almost like mourning, about your child turning 2?  I felt extremely sad tonight just thinking about the fact that in just one more DAY, our little girl will be a 2 year old.  I just love her being 1!!  I know that there are going to be so many new and exciting things happening in the next year, but I just love counting down the months and once she turns 2, she's just...2.  No more counting months.  No more looking at milestones.  No more "she's just a baby".  She will officially be a "real" toddler.  A toddler who cannot get by with "baby" stuff.  A toddler who will be talking more than usual and being understood (not necessarily a bad thing;)).  A toddler who will just be looped into the big, wide world of kids.  Ugh.  It really hurts.

I guess I am just mourning the fact that my "baby" will not be categorized as a baby any longer.  Yeah, at 1, technically she wasn't, either, but since she wasn't walking at 1, it didn't feel like she wasn't a baby.

I guess just like everything else (ahem, me turning the big 3-0), I will just have to get over it.

My baby is growing up.:/

Sweet dreams, darling

My daughter just repeated back to us tonight, "Sweet dreams, nite nite, I love you!" at bedtime (the "I love you" was the best part since she rarely says it and this was as clear as day).  She is growing up soooo fast.  Next month, when she turns 2, I just might cry at her birthday party.

Don't say I didn't warn you.;)

"Dodging bullets"

Wow.  Do you ever have to just THANK THE LORD for not giving you your way sometimes? I mean, just think about one time (or many) where He may not have allowed you to get a job you really wanted, to date a person you really desired, or to get some place you really wanted to go.  Now think about the path having that thing would have led you down.  We always like to think that we would have been richer, happier, or just plain better off because of it, but that is so not necessarily true.  That dream job that you applied to and so DESPERATELY needed to have two years ago that would have been the end to your money problems forever?  That company just decided to lay off every new employee they hired since, get this, two years ago.  That person who would have made the PERFECT boyfriend/girlfriend?  Just cheated on their current love.  That place you didn't make it to because you got lost/was running late/accident on the road kept you from making it?  There was just a shooting there.  Some people may call all of these instances "dodging a bullet" or a "coincidence", but really it is so much more than that.

God sees the future (not to mention the past and present).  We see the present and what our future could POTENTIALLY look like, but God sees what it IS and what it can/will be.  So praise those moments that do not come into fruition, because sometimes, most of the time, it is because God is choosing to bless us with a better course of events in our lives.  

Lead Me

I was reading this blog today and it really made me think (she definitely has a way with words).  She speaks about how her son wanted to desperately play a game with her and she told him that she would play with him a little later.  Meanwhile, he was preparing the table for the game when he accidentally spilled milk.  She got after him and he went up to his room and cried.  She went up and apologized to him and he told her he loved her.

Our sweet little girl has gotten into the habit of coming to us, taking us by the hand whereever we are in the house, and leading us to where she wants us to be.  While sometimes I am in the middle of something, I always allow her to lead me away...now.  I made a mistake when she first started trying to lead me away and she let me have it.  I now understand that it is important to her, even if it is just leading you to watch a cartoon with her.

Sometimes you need someone to lead you.  Lead you away from the dishes in the sink.  Lead you away from the computer.  Lead you away from your phone.  Lead you away from the laundry.  She is more important than all of that and more.  Whatever she is leading me away to may not seem very important to us at the time, but it is very important to her.  The time spent watching her favorite cartoon with her is quality snuggling time.  The time spent coloring with her is quality educational time.  The time spent outside with her is quality exercise time.  These are all moments of time that we will never get back.  So cherish them.  Each and every day.

So go ahead, my sweet little girl, lead me to something great.:)  

Let's try this again, shall we?

Okay, so I was supposed to start getting better about posting on my blog...but I have kinda failed miserably.  I just realized that I haven't posted since May.

Whoops.

So, let's try this thing again and see how it goes.  I won't promise that I will get in the habit of writing every day, but I will set a goal for once a week and that way if I actually do post more than once a week, I will still be doing good.  Actually I would be doing EXCELLENT because staying home with a toddler that rarely sits down is no joke.  Seriously.  Not kidding.  I have blurry pictures as proof.  More to come later.  I promise this time.;)